It’s not Kristi Noem’s actions as much as her bragging about them

When I grew up in rural upstate New York, it was legal to shoot a dog running deer. Left to their own devices, dogs chase deer, nipping at their back legs until they snap the tendon. Once they do that, they often leave the deer to die. Shooting a dog for that is cruel, but it’s also something the dog owner can avoid by tethering their dog.

In that context, it’s possible Kristi Noem did an appropriate thing shooting her dog Cricket for attacking chickens. It’s also possible she didn’t. Either way, it’s not what she did, but how she positioned it that makes me wonder about her humanity.

If I decided my dog had to be put down, that decision would haunt me for the rest of my life. In the dark times when my mind had nothing else to do, I’d go over it again and again, wondering if I’d everything possible to prevent that outcome. I wouldn’t speak of it, and I certainly wouldn’t hold it up as a red badge of courage that shows my wonderful leadership abilities.

There’s been plenty of social media condemnation of Noem’s admission. Some have said she’s killed any chance of being Donald Trump’s vice presidential pick. I’m not so sure.

Noem’s defenders would say she’s being unfairly attacked–that her critics are too soft and don’t have the backbone to support difficult necessary choices. They’d say the snowflakes are showing their true colors, and that their opposition to her actions are the reason criminals run rampant.

They’d say (with some validity) that animals die every day, and that no one loses their mind when a cow is killed so we can have burgers and steaks. It’s the circle of life, they might say.

It wouldn’t be a surprise to see her use the criticism as a lever to make her the victim. And it wouldn’t be a surprise to see the guy she might be trying to impress, Donald Trump, rise to her defense, grouping her with him as victims as all the bad people.

Though I can’t judge Kristi Noem for what she did, I can criticize how she’s positioned herself. I’ve never had to kill an animal, but I’ve had to recommend that people not be retained for a job. I’ve had to determine that we can’t do business with a company. I’ve had to ask that we not be serviced by someone.

In all those cases, there were impacts on the people on the other side of that equation. Jobs were probably lost. I recognized that when I made the decision, and I made that decision with self-doubt and profound sadness. It was never something I held up as proof that I was somehow fitter or better than others. It was never a cause for self-congratulation, but self-doubt.

Real leaders doubt their actions. They feel profound sadness when they have to consign someone, even an animal, to elimination. It’s a horrible, but necessary part of being a leader.

Anyone who brags about it isn’t a leader. They’re a parody of leadership.